Burning Bridges

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They say as we get older we start to lose friends, and its not a bad thing. I am not new to this thing at all. Im going to take you a few years back when I moved back here in Dubai on the first story.
1. Lady Nay  – is one of my ex flatmates when I was in Emirates. When

 i moved back out here after 3 years in Qatar, she sent me a message saying hi and all that and she asked me for my new mobile number and of course not knowing whats about to come, I happily gave it to her. Few days later I reveived a call from a telecom company saying I have an unsettled bill of 2300 AED, as far as I can remember (equivalent to 27000 PHP). I was shocked to find out about it, I remember settling the bill and collecting cash from all the flatmates before I moved out, and the reason why it wasnt changed to their name is because of 1, time and 2, that it would take a while to have it reconnected for them. I made a Facebook group chat and added all the ex flatmates and whoever moved in after me. I asked them if they know about this bill and I mentioned I dont even know how they got my number in the first place. I said clearly,

“This is NOT my bill because I wasnt even here, I lived in Qatar for 3 years. “

Lei then said that she gave my number because another gil K, who is left there in that old apartment is being bugged to pay the bill. So then, she wants me to pay for something that I did not consume? She said theyve stopped paying for it because there was a discrepancy on the billing that they cannot see as Im the only one who has the access. I said you could have contacted me for it. She said there was a time that she got offended because the first time I visited Dubai after moving to Doha, I said I did not have time to do the name transfer for the internet connection. So then probably she thinks its a payback so she left it because, she kept saying its my problem, even though I attended her wedding and flew back and forth to Dubai to visit them so many times when she could have told me. Then just to be clear I took all the copy of the bills and found no discrepancy at all, just plain bills they did not pay. Then her tune now changed saying she did not stay there all the time because she was staying with her bf.. I said somebody has to pay this bill and its not me. Whoever lived there and used the internet should pay, very simple. When cornered, she got all nasty attacked me personally saying:

“Youre so irrespossible, youre going to leave a mess and you think we will clean it for you..”

It went on, with more personal insults even saying I have to fix my life, “be prepared of whats to come..” and all with the fact that she actually gave  this telecom company my number.. Very brave on messaging but did not want to meet with me to settle her shit. In the end , She paid only 500AED which is nothing and said again its my problem how I will settle that bill . I had to pay the bill because the telecom company said they will have to take legal actions if the bill isnt settled. When I paid them, they mentioned do not trust these things even to friends, and I should not have to be honest… Lei after that, even being the one who actually did me wrong said nasty things, blocked me on Facebook like shes the victim, what an arrogant tool.
LESSON LEARNED: Do not trust anyone involving money and dont leave anything under my name for people like her who will rack up that amount and not pay. I’ll have to admit that one. Very important.
… and this is only story number 1. 😅
2. Feeling KWEEN  – K was a “goodtime” and “going out friend” lets imagesay. Went out a lot and partied with her early days when I just moved back out here. She would actually let you stay in her place and probably keep you company (She likes to have someone to drag around as well) until she meets a guy for the night, I remember her leaving me in a club when she went with a guy, I ddnt have my key for my apartment because i left it at her’s where we got ready. Had to knock at what time of the night at her apartment, luckily her cousin was still awake. Anyway, its very early when I realized who she really is. Shes a bit of a bully when she wants something and becomes a whole lot of nasty when she doesnt get her way. I did not like the way she messages my boyfriend behind my back for random stuff and even asking him to drive her to some place. Maybe Im a bit of a tiger myself, haha.. but I do believe thats its common courtesy you dont really message your friends’ boyfriends before messaging your friend first.She has a history of messaging one of our friend’s guy during wee hours of the night and ending up having lunch with him the day after, and when caught, she said that the other friend is well aware of it, but of course its a lie. Shes also the kind of friend that when you said ill throw a party tomorrow, throws one herself the next day and say its a tradition. Did this happen? Yes, to me.. haha 😅 When these things came out and all the other things she did not only to me, but to most of us. She even sealed it with a gossip that I always get “taken home by guys on nights out..” when as a matter of fact we caught her a few times out with guys in a pub while her boyfriend is in Scotland, saying ” Im saving myself for him.” 😳
3. The Drama Major – I remember having proper chats with her at the img_0729beginning. I even found her to be someone I can probably confide to, and I sure did. I shared my thoughts with her when I had my first fight with my boyfriend. Later on I noticed, she doesnt really open up to me about her and just takes info and and felt like she likes being right when she gives me advices. I felt like I had to be careful and so I stopped sharing with her. I observed her. One time there was a birthday party where we were all at, and someone started a psychology kind of test where you have to pick things, and according to what you picked, this would tell about you. She went last. She knew already what the results would be when you pick a certain thing listening to others when they had their go. So in the end, everyone was kind of in an awe when she gave her pageant answer. Part of it was like:

“I can see me and the horse running into the storm together…”

Later on, we were in a club and her and my boyfriend had a chat about lovelife and all. She asked him when hes planning to settle down and propose to me. Brian said in about a year and all things nice. The next day, she came to me and said:

“If a guy is not ready to marry you, dont force him..”

I was shocked. I asked her why was she telling me all these? When I know what Brian told you anyway and nobody is forcing anybody here. I cant remember what she said after that. I said to myself there is something wrong with this person.
So we carried on, being just casual friends but I never opened up anything to her anymore at all. Then last year, something bad happened sort of like a scandal. Bottom line is she thinks a few of us wasnt sincere and concerened enough, something like that. I may not know what the real reason is because Im not planning to ask her, but I dont think that this has something to do about us, her used to be friends, but was a moment of downfall for her. She couldnt make things appear perfect anymore and she cant make us all believe what she says, at least not me.
4. Maid-of-NO-MORE – of all the “friends” I lost this is probably the one img_5684that hurt me the most. She’s meant to be my Maid-of-Honor on my wedding. This only happened last month when I attended her wedding as her bridesmaid. Since we are both getting married, her in January and me in April, we did a bit of wedding planning together. I was telling her a lot of stuff/detail that me and Brian were planning to do. I even sent her pictures. Day of her wedding came: I saw a lot of things on their wedding which are the things I told her Im doing for mine. I was heartbroken. I thought maybe she did not have enough time to plan more things and give her a benefit of a doubt until even the first dance song I chose was played on their money dance (after seeing the exact cake I sent her a picture of, the robes which just got delivered then i even told her about and so on), I had to walk out, its pure bullshit. I did not speak to her anymore after that at her wedding. I sent her a message a day after telling her

“Congrats again on your wedding. I didnt want to tell you last night. But Im really offended that you used the same song which you know means something to me. I can clearly remember when we did a bit of wedding planning at home and I told you about that song, that were going to use that as the first dance song. I even showed you on Youtube. I ddnt but the copyright for it but you know what I mean. You know what fine, you got the same cake exactly on the picture I sent you and same a lot of things, but even the song really? Its like you dont care how I would feel just because your wedding is gna come first anyway and like you did not realize im actually coming to your wedding and that I would see. I trusted you and shared, with more than I actually share to any friends so Idk how it ended up like this.”

She replied to me saying she ddnt mean to hurt me but she ddnt copy anything and that were probably pinning the same things on Pinterest and all that. So much bullshit. I called the baker and asked to change my cake’s design and I added that I did not want it to be stiff, and she said “Why whats wrong with Maggie’s cake, the cake was as per her instructions.” — OH WELL THERE YOU GO. Then of course I realized, she didnt really share much to me detail wise which was my mistake, well when youre so excited and you thought youre telling your best friend, hmm.. think again.

Anyway, bottomline is shes never going to admit nor Im getting any apology, and I told her that. Even her husband sent Brian a message saying:

“…it should be a celebration not a competetion. But if you want to copy anything from our wedding were ok with it.”

So God knows what she told him. I told her Im not going to have a MOH on my wedding as originally planned when Leslie (my bff from Italy), said she couldnt make it. She then started removing herself on the bridesmaid group I made and removed me from hers as well. I feel like shes even the one getting bad about it. Then also found out recently that she  deleted me from her Facebook. 😱

Now from that, I feel like shes doing what she has to do to protect herself and whatever it takes so this doesnt come out or that so she doesnt have to deal with it anymore. Im very well impressed with her and her bitch-move I did not see coming. The fact is, whatever I feel did not matter because her wedding came first anyway. She probably thought Id stand there, smile and keep quiet and pretend everything is ok. She wants the kind of  friendship which is only rainbows and unicorns, well I am just very happy to call you out cheers to margaritas, very well played. 😊
REGRETS. Ive got loads. Ive been sharing thoughts and all sort of things to her. She should not have known me like that.
5. THE SHOCKER childhood friend – Ive known her since gradeschool. She caught me off guard on this one, and It only happened few days ago. So I was hurt because we never had an issue. Well, not that I know of. So basically she told friends from back home this

“… So just trust in time (to another friend referring to engagement), like me Im just chilling. Nice to have no expectations and pressure, things then happen rather by force.
Like Yzelle, I found out she just pressured Brian into proposing to her, and if not this year just forget about it. So I hope they last. This is the gossip, ____ said.
Brian, was hassled shes pressuring her too much. Hea just probably too nice and really loves her so he agreed.”

imageOuch. We never had an issue like this at all. We know where were going and I dont have to force anyone to marry me, plus I dont think that anyone could actually force a guy into proposing to a girl if hes not ready. This kinda went around and I do hate her for making fun of us like that, whatever her intentions were. It felt like shes found something that could be a flaw and so shes so happy to share it, without even actually asking me if its true. Thats what an actual friend would do and her and Brian also chat abour life and hes nice to her, so I just dont get it. Fine, I know shes going through a lot of stuff in her life but this isnt a way for hers to get better. I confronted her and she admitted to it, apologized and said shes really embarassed. I maybe able to forgive. But I dont think I will be friends with her again.
WHY AND HOW COULD SHE…???? I dont have a clue. Proves even how long you know a person doesnt mean they will be true and loyal.

6. SNEakey Pretender  –  I met this one on an assessment for a cabin crew job. Turned out were both from Qatar Airways. Since were kind of like in the same page, clean slate and all that and so we started hanging out a lot. I introduced her to my friends over here. Eventually like everybody else, I got to know her and stepped back a little.

From what I have observed, shes a little bit sneaky and twists storiesBut she likes to be everybodys friend.

There was a time, she disappeared from a club and one of our friends called me to help find her. Eventually we found her in the penthouse apartment I used to live in, there were like 8 rooms. So after we did not find her in her room we saw signs suggesting she might be on the other room. We then found her in some “state” passed out so Brian stood up for her and punched this guy for doing what hes done to a drunk girl. Eventually, she admitted that she actually came on to him. Surprise, surprise. — This story was twisted to she was raped. And how it was hard for her at first, but with the support of her boyfriend who came to her rescue (she told me her bf was Canadian as well before,  but he isnt, not sure why and hes actually a nice guy), God knows what she told him.. but she overcame it. She doesnt even have a problem telling this story in front of me, who was there who knew what really happened.

Another time, was when I had a flight so Brian went out with her and her bf. Brian met an Irish girl and chatted with her about home and all. Long story short, she made it out that Brian was flirting when im not around. Brian didnt like this and told her off telling her not to make up this kind of BS ever again. She said sorry. But ddnt stop her from bringing this up on one conversation we had in front of other friends starting with

“I dont know if Brian told you about this one night we were out…”

I said i know. Actually I should have listened to what shes about to say. But I told her and Brian said he messaged you not to do what you did again.

Anyway, so this SNEAKY PRETENDER is the one told number 5 the gossip she spread.

When actually, she opened to me and Brian before about being unsure about why after 5 years, she hasnt met her bfs family. She said if not that year, she might rethink it and at least shes not wasting her time. And then I hear something like this that she said about me. I told her this when I confornted her. She said maybe she misuderstood what Brian joked about, something stupid like this.

So this is the kind of stories and jokes she remembers and tells people. OF COURSE! 👍🏼

Later on I realized all the other malicious comments she has towards other people, even people who are close to her.

Astrid– she said the same thing about this common friend of ours, that she only forced her now husband to propose to her. (why is this popular anyway? 🤔)

Nicole – another common friend, when she got pregnant she said yea she has to resign and shes like spending like a queen but shes broke..

C – Shes a single mom like myself. and she said she looks like she had different priorities looking at what shes doung with her life going out and all.

.. Like do I need to know this? These people close to her and shes commenting things like this. It should have been a no brainer. Its natural for her to be this way. I think one of the most dangerous kind youd meet. I would expect this from someone I dont get along with or an enemy.

Makes me miss my bestfriends. Irish and Leslie. I miss you both, why is Singapore and Italy so far away?

As for me, I may not be a perfect friend either but I dont do these things to my friends. I hope I learn my lessons and pray to soon forgive.💋 Z

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